Sleepy Gonzales

In Maputo travellers can get real value for money. Tonight the local police settled on a £50 bribe rather than the usual £120.

After 2 days on safari, I can now distinguish instantly between elephant, rhino, buffalo, and giraffe dung. #MyFavouriteIsElephant

Africa: Day 3: Prospects looking grim. Haven’t seen a Starbucks, Costa, Pret, or even a f’ing Cafe Nero since we set off. #DontShowFear

Sure this water supply is clean. Look at those waterborne parasites, they’re spotless.

Are these dangerous? I think I should drop the iPhone and run http://t.co/eiyDocSJ #hipstamatic

Africa: 101 things to avoid before I die: 1.Somali Pirates 2.Carjacking 3.Being lunch 4.having something lay it’s eggs in me.

Photo of the day: Car accident by @Sleepy_Gonzales http://t.co/zA8ws6be

Mumford & Sons and Arcade Fire. Picking up the baton from Devo to prove dorks can still be successful in Music.

Had breakfast this am with Rick Astley. Actually, he was on the next table and I was staring inappropriately. I think he lost his appetite.